Back from Tejas.

Adam and I just returned from a long weekend without our child. We headed down to Texas to see Uncle Paul, one of my mother's best friends from childhood. My mom stayed at our house with Gracen, and I'm pretty sure she would have preferred for us to stay away much longer. Gracen showed no signs of missing us while we were away, but became clingy and cranky upon our arrival. I am assuming this meant she just became aware of how desperately she had been missing us and needed to express her sadness at our separation. She has been hopelessly spoiled in our absence was very sad to see her Ghi-ghi leave this morning.

Mama also had a birthday dinner for me last night with some friends. It helped cushion the blow of becoming 30 to be surrounded by the people I love. Thank you so much for everything you did Mama. I hope Gracie grows up to love me as much as I love you.

Thoughts on Thirty: I think my cousin Olivia's call to me yesterday summed it up best when she said, "Dang, you're old." She will be turning 17 tomorrow. Thanks Livi. If I didn't love you so much, I'd have to hate you a little bit. I'm trying to run through my list of goals for my 30th year, and much like my 25th year, which was also packed with would-be accomplishments, I've managed to skip over so many. My travel log is short, my novels unpublished (and unwritten), my languages are all still foreign, etc.

But for all that I've ended up not achieving as I had planned, I find myself happier and more complete than I have ever been. I am surrounded by people that lift me up and motivate me to be the best version of myself and who love me unconditionally in spite of my shortcomings. I have a child that amazes me and that I love beyond reason and sanity. I have the love of my life, who I know without question loves me back just as crazy and hard, even when I'm not so lovable. My body and mind are healthy. I may be a little more wrinkly and a little saggier, and my hair's a little frizzier and unmanageable. But I'm okay with it. It's just proof that I've been around a time or two. I'm still just me, perhaps the best me so far. I'm grateful for my 30 years.

I think I'll skip making a list for 40.

View of Lake Austin from Shepherd Mountain home.

Paul and Adam, lounging on the patio at the ranch.

View of Lake Travis from ranch.

View from Deep Woods home, overlooking Austin.

Winery, somewhere between Lago Vista and Marble Falls.

More of the vinyards...I love wine. I didn't drink any...

My husband's famous!!

The dam doctor we live with was on the news tonight! If you click on "video," you can see his handsome face.

http://www.nbc17.com/midatlantic/ncn/news.apx.-content-articles-NCN-2007-09-13-0014.html

We love our smart guy...

let's pretend it's monday...

...that way, I'm only a day late for my Sunday post and wonderfully early for my Wednesday post. I feel my new rule to self is going poorly. I don't think I like deadlines. Dear Cotton Mamas,

I was wrong, dead wrong. I have given several of you advice on how to appropriately wash diapers. This was based on extensive Internet research and personal trial periods. Wrong, wrong, wrong. I've been having an issue with Gracen's BumGenius diapers leaking. I had assumed she's just a super-soaker, but it's been getting increasingly worse. I finally broke down and called cottonbabies yesterday (1-888-33-BABIES) and she asked me to tell my story. She had a gentle voice, speaking in a very caring, counseloresque manner. I immediately fell in love with her as my new best friend. I told her of my cold soak, usually with a dab (1/2 cup) of baking soda. My washing on "hot" with the "natural" detergent and occasional dashes of white vinegar. This is followed by the 90 minutes of drying on medium, followed then by another 15-30 minutes of drying on high (which I know is bad, but they just won't dry).

After my story, she said, so sweetly, "That's wonderful that you have such a good system. I bet you're a great mom! Listening to you, I'm noticing a few things that might help you out. First of all, you should never, ever use baking soda. This will eventually rip out the elasticity in your fabric and damage seams. And that's true of vinegar too. I bet that's disappointing for you because they both seem to make a lot of sense. Also, there are only a few natural detergents that you can actually use (and here she went on for a while about enzymes and Gracen was running around squealing and really, I have no clue what she said). So it sounds to me like your liners are just repelling, but we can fix it, so you're going to be just fine. This happens all the time, sweetie. It's just those darn detergents."

So here's how you fix them: You wash them as hot as possible with nothing but DAWN dish detergent. If you have a front loader, just use a tablespoon or two. You want them to be frothy, but not explode out of the washer. And then you wash again. And then you wash again, but this time with nothing but water. (yes, that was THREE washes, though you may not need that if they're only slightly repelling liquids) And after that, it may be necessary to do a cold rinse and spin. It was for us, as I seem to have gotten a little too excited with the Dawn on the second cycle. And after 60 minutes of drying on medium heat, they were dry. woooooo-weeeeeee!!! I'm hoping that this has been the source of our trouble for our "outing" leakages. We may even get so bold as to try them at night again.

My other concern was the stinkiness, which was why I had started the baking soda and vinegar in the first place. We have incredibly hard water (which can be fixed fore a mere $4K-7K), so residues from cleaners and whatnot build up over time. The lady's solution for this is 1/16 to 1/8 of a cup of bleach every month or so as needed. I hate the idea of getting bleach that close to my baby's bum, but we'll do what we must.

Jess, you're probably going to have to do this to yours, as I feel quite certain I destroyed them before you got them. Jo, yours are probably okay since my inexperience and pollutants hadn't hit them yet. I just ordered a gallon of detergent from cottonbabies, which is the one they feel is best all-around.

Good luck ladies, and I'm sorry for steering you wrong. My advice would be to check out this help page. They told me there is a list of detergents somewhere, but I'm still searching.

1) 2) 3)

1) Happy baby, sporting new ponytail look 2)Excited baby, getting ready to go swing 3)Miserable baby, had to come back inside from swinging and VERY angry at her mother.

I'll try to have a more interesting post next time...but I love you...and I'm glad your visiting...

Happy, Happy Day!!!!!!

Trisha Marie, one of our favorite people in the universe, is turning 30 today!! We hope you have a fabulous day, dear friend. (I'm right behind you...)
LOVE YOU!!!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!

insomnia.

Calm down, folks. It's still Wednesday--I haven't broken my new rule just yet...

Looking back on our first phase of teething, the process seems to have been quite insignificant in my memories. I vaguely remember some excessive drooling, some clinging, but not much else. I'm pretty sure I whined about it, as I tend to do, but I really think that it wasn't all that bad.

But teeth get bigger the further you go back in that lil' head, and there are a lot more of them. I'm very, very aware of that now. Molars are not fun. The daytime is fine. Gracen is easily distracted and amused by the world and her "sponginess" at the moment. But nights, oh the nights. Perhaps it is because all the blood rushes to one's head whilst asleep and makes areas more sensitive, but whatever the case, I haven't slept in two weeks. That may be a little dramatic, as it probably hasn't been two weeks yet (though it feels like months), and I do sleep periodically. We have reverted much to the life of a newborn. Though had we had the normal newborn sleeping pattern experience, I might be toughened up for this current madness. Gracie, however, and I don't mean to brag but will, has more or less slept through the night since she arrived, give or take a few sleepy feedings. We have/had been blessed.

I've been moving into the guestroom, typically by 2 AM, where I get to spend the next couple of hours cuddling with, wrestling with, playing with my beautiful child. She pokes me in the eyeball, saying "eye!" with a wonderful southern drawl and squeezes my nose (we've been working on body parts lately). She hides Froggy under the covers and wants me to play peek-a-boo with him, which I do. She sticks her pacies in my mouth with a "num-num." She throws pillows off the bed singing, "uh-oh" then does it again and again and again. The next part I love: she finally snuggles up, just where she wants to be, and sleeps. It's wonderful. I lie there awake for another 30 minutes or so, thinking about our lives together, getting all mushy and corny. And then she wakes back up, timing it just perfectly to me finally slipping off to dreamland. And then we repeat. and repeat...

She's in bed now, dosed up on motrin and tylenol. I'm hoping for the best.

Photos are from Labor Day hike down by the lake.

Tar Heel born and Tar Heel bred...

Happy almost Labor Day, friends!! We haven't yet decided what our big plans will be, but we assume we'll be outdoors. Perhaps we'll hit some trails or a nice, slow river.

Yesterday was an exciting day, as we made it to our first UNC sporting event as a family unit. We were successful and enthusiastic and well-behaved for one whole quarter. We left before we made a scene. But for that first quarter, which Adam claims is the best quarter of a football game anyway, our girl was a champ. She clapped when appropriate and threw her arms up when we made touchdowns. The latter is a skill her Daddy has been teaching her when they watch soccer. She can also yell "Gooooaaaaaalllll" for an extended period of time, much like the Spanish-speaking announcers, which she did beautifully for our Tar Heels.

After leaving the game, we headed back towards Franklin Street, passing the Old Well and letting her frolic on the quad. This was, at least for me, just as exciting as the game. We were eaten by mosquitoes (Adam sustained no bites, as usual), tripped over roots and ran into trees, hugged a fire hydrant, chased squirrels, laughed and ran, and pitched a terrible fit when we had to head back to the car.

I love my little family, and I love this town.

gracen and walker, sittin' in a tree...

K.I.S.S.I.N.G.

We're having to peel them off of each other. Both little darlings have recently discovered the kiss. They blow them, plant them, whatever, with a nice "umm-waah" or a smack. For the last few days, however, the kiddies are taking it to a new extreme and are embracing in a full mouth-to-mouth lock. If Amy and I could stop laughing long enough to pry them apart and explain that this behavior is bordering on inappropriate, we would. But, the laughter wins. We really have to get a picture. It probably won't be too difficult to do.

Gracen is napping. Her head started bobbing while sitting in her high chair at lunch. I rescued her, and she was in full slumber by the time we made it upstairs. I suppose this was the result of waking up at 5:30 [her very mean parents (and by parents I mean mother) changed her diaper, gave her milk, turned off the monitors and ignored her until 7:15]. I figure she needs to be comfortable with some "alone" time.

Ghi-ghi left us yesterday after a short, but lovely visit. We forgot to take pictures, again. Sorry, Mama. Thank you for coming...

baby BOOM!

I am attempting to upload a test video. Did you see the new icon on your post page? Very exciting. Blogger's getting crazy. Unfortunately, I set it to upload about an hour ago, and nothing seems to be happening. I'll give it another hour, but I suppose I should be writing something whilst I wait. [have now failed and am bitter--YouTube is also anti-shanna today--sorry!]

New rule for self (and because I'm making my sister angry): I will publish a post every Sunday and Wednesday. No more excuses, even if it's just a picture.

It has been a busy couple of weeks of female procreation for our friends. Kevin and Annice just had a little girl, Naki Dahn-Bi. Justin and Emily just had a girl, Simone. Brooke and Ryan just had a girl, Lily Grey. And Jo and Aaron just had a girl, Rory Grace. Jason and Victoria are expecting a girl in a few weeks. I love little girls. Congrats to all of you!!

Last night, we had a send off party for Jason and Alison who are going on a sailing sabbatical until April. They have a wonderful website to keep us up on all their travels. We'll miss you friends and will hopefully come join you for a long weekend! We're still recovering from the festivities...

Pics of G in her party dress...

AAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SHE JUST MADE PEE-PEE IN THE POTTY!!!!!

Book Report

A Confederacy of Dunces, can finally be checked off my book list. After seven years of beginning and pausing, I am finished. And I might add, it is a brilliant book. I see why it won the Pulitzer. I was just disappointed when searching Amazon.com for a picture of the jacket cover for this book, and I found two completely different covers than mine. These had depictions of our main character, Ignatius, and I am grateful not to have seen them beforehand. The writing was so impeccably descriptive that seeing a vision before reading would have taken away from the image the writing creates for you. He is an exquisite character, in so many dimensions. And the picture in my mind is so much more interesting than these cartoonesque cover productions. The book is laborious, at least for me, but worth the time of reading it and soaking in the language.

The following are bedtime pictures.

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i'm so crafty.

Okay, I'm not really all that crafty, but I want to be eventually, and I'm going to work on it. And now that I've got a sewing machine that isn't working against me, I can play and see where it takes me. I still have to figure out how to make straight lines. This seems to be a problem. So far I've made:

1) a dress for Gracen out of one of Adam's work's t-shirts (kid size), which reads "Make Wetlands, Not War." She's quite the political environmentalist, you know.

2) a pair of drawstring pants for Gracen out of an old t-shirt of mine. I was very proud, as this was made while I was still forcing my broken machine to produce something. After all was said and done, and I turned it outside-in for completion, I realized that one of the seams had been done inside-out. I decided to put it on her anyway, and they came mid way up her bootie and the legs were about 4 inches too long. I threw them away.

3) pillow for the glider to match the ottoman that I had recovered (using that upholstery fabric I sent you, Kate). If I want the ugly seam to be hidden, I have to have the fabric upside down (it's a funky landscape scene). I had even rationalized this as I was sewing and still did it upside down.

4) a shirt for Gracen out of one of my old shirts. This lovely number is the blue and white tank she's wearing a couple of posts ago. The original shirt was too small, so I had to cut the back, reseam and add little straps across the back. I was quite proud of that one, though I think she's already outgrown it.

5) AND, my biggest project to date, a slip cover for Gracen's crib bumper out of an old white bedspread. I had grown tired of the pastels, flowers, and butterflies that I had been staring at since a few months before her birth. We took the bumber and bed skirt away altogether, but her 10 pacifiers kept falling out during the night, which upset her greatly. I was also inspired by a new bedskirt I got at the PTA thrift shop (for $1), which matches her crib quilt perfectly. In that thrift store visit I also purchased a pair of river Tevas for me ($3), a new rolling desk chair ($3), and a hat for Gracen ($1 and pictured in last boating post). I still need to make straps for the bumper, but I haven't decided what I want yet. Right now, blue knitting yarn is sewed on, holding it in place.

In other news, our first molar has broken the gumline and is peering through. I'm hoping this has been the source of her refusal to sleep the last week or so. She made it all night last night!! At least I think she did. It's entirely possible that I turned off the monitor and ignored her due to my 3 hours of sleep the previous night.

singing: "peeea-nuuut, peanut butter (hands up), jelly (low voice, hands down), repeat...

For the six of you Weaverville Primary readers, I hope you enjoy having that little diddy stuck in your noggin for the next 48 hours. For the rest of you, just ignore me. Shall I continue?: "First you take the peanuts and you smash 'em, you smash 'em, you smash 'em, smash 'em, smash 'em, then you spread 'em, you spread 'em, you spread 'em, spread 'em, spread 'em, then you eat it, you eat it, you eat it, eat it, eat it."

AND THEN YOU BREAK OUT IN HIVES!

(Mrs. Smathers left that part out of our musical education)

Gracen has had peanut butter before, has smeared it all over her pretty little face, ingested it and whatnot. No reaction. Nada. However, last night I was having a snack of a spoonful of peanut butter (and I wonder why the baby bulge is taking so long to recede?!), and let Gracen have a bit, which she quickly smeared all over her face. When I wiped away the goup, everywhere that the peanut butter had been had turned BRIGHT red. After a couple of minutes, the redness spread to her neck and chest. We WebMD-ed peanut allergies (it'll scare the ba-jeezeles out of you), called the emergency nurse hotline, called Dr. Laura (who by the way is back in Chapel Hill and expecting a BOY on January 1st--WOO-HOOO!!), bathed her, and dosed her up on 3.75 mls of Benadryl. The redness quickly subsided, she showed no signs of respiratory distress, and she survived. Some children are knocked out with Benadryl. In fact, I was a little excited about the idea of an early bedtime and sleeping in. Other children, we were warned, get hyper. We had the latter reaction. Of course. I think she finally fell asleep around10:30 (her bedtime is 7:30), and woke up for a play date with Mama at 4 AM. After falling back to sleep in bed with me sometime after 5 AM (I fell asleep with her still giggling, playing with my face and making Froggy kiss me 427 times), she woke at 7:45. She has now been lying in her crib talking to herself for one hour and eight minutes. It's nap time, kid. Anyway, we go to our 15 month well-baby check on Wednesday, so we'll be discussing her potential peanut allergy and further testing. It's possible for some kids to have only topical reactions and eating the peanuts are fine. A life without peanut butter just sounds so very sad to me.

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Yesterday, we took Gracen out on her first boating adventure. Adam got two new hybrid boats (canoe/sit-on-top kayak) for work, and they are conveniently living in our driveway at the moment. We took her to the Haw River, upstream of the dam, in calm water. She loved it, and we are very excited that she's taking to outdoor/adventure living so well. Adam is helping me overcome my overly-paranoid-baby-gonna-fall-out-be-stung-by-a-bee-attacked-by-a-copperhead-get-sunscreen-in-her-eyes nature. Sunday was a good step forward for me. Now, if we can just get the Chapel Hill 140 degree weather and choking humidity to back off, we'll be outside as often as possible. (side note: I can't even dry clothes/diapers outside due to the humidity!)

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Pics...

(check back later for some boating pictures from Adam)

Gracen practicing her writing skills. This quickly turned into a crayon snack, and I spent 20 minutes pulling wax particles out of her mouth, while dodging a 7-toothed bite.

If Mama or Daddy aren't there to let her sit in their lap while she reads, she goes to the welcoming arms of Big Bunny. Yes, that is his name. If you want me to branch out people, you might have to give me some suggestions.

Having snack (dried cherries and cracker bunnies) time sitting shotgun in the Prius and singing along to JT (belle and han will be so proud), while Daddy hauls two boats up a big hill.

Gracen has learned to crawl up and on furniture. I don't like it. I don't like it. I don't like it. She, however, loves it.